it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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