It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
You were trust falling into bushes
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
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