"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
