he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Help. Why am I so naked?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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