it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
There's a bachlorette party going on at the bowling alley, so we'll see who wins greatest shitshow tonight.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
