bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe this. 100 bucks says my Botox lasts longer than their marriage will.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
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