ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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