I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
