is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
