Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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