one word: firstdatebathroomanal
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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