would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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