You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
Randomize