i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
