I'm drive I can fine osifer
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be still, my beating vagina.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
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