do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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