so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
