Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
