hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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