did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
My financial advisor pointed out that 37% of my income is currently going towards "non-essential food items"
That's banker lingo for "you're an alcoholic"
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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