omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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