remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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