member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
