Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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