Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
