You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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