Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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