I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Randomize
