You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
