We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
