He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Why do I fail so hard at ironing, when I'm a woman and i should be amazing at it?
because god found you far too good at oral sex and had to make all things even?
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
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