hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
