So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
On my way home I saw a car that had "MOVE OVER PLZ" emblazoned across the windshield backwards, so people could see it in their rearview mirror
If I ever drive for Lyft or Uber I'm definitely gonna do that
Randomize
