Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize