sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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