Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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