I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
