it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize