think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
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