I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
