his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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