Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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