This girl is more easily done than said...
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
Randomize
