And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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