im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
