I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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