She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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