i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
