I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
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