I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
Randomize
